Source: http://www.inc.com/drew-hendricks/8-ways-emotionally-intelligent-people-deal-with-toxic-people.html
8 Ways Emotionally Intelligent People Deal With Toxic People
Toxic people poison those around them, and gain satisfaction from creating disorganization and a stressful atmosphere.
Life is stressful enough for most of us. Allowing a toxic individual to ravage your immediate environment can cause havoc in your mental well-being, which can lead to physical challenges.
A bad state of mind not only affects your physical well-being but makes it difficult for you to respond calmly under pressure. Ninety percent of top performers are skilled at managing their emotions, so your ability to perform effectively can be affected if you do not adopt strategies that will allow you to deal with toxic people.
1. Successful People Establish Boundaries
There is a fine line between being friendly and allowing somebody to lead you down a path that jeopardizes your ability to remain effective. Successful people understand this and do not allow the toxic among them to take charge, but rather choose to set effective boundaries.
2. No One Limits Their Joy
How much do the words of those around you affect your state of mind? Successful people have mastered the ability to ensure that the negative remarks of others do not affect their strong sense of accomplishment. Toxic people like to break you down with rude, hurtful comments, and gain satisfaction from watching you fall apart.
Learn to react less to the opinions of others, especially those you know do not have your well-being at heart.
3. They Have Mastered the Art of Rising Above
From a seminar session by John Rampton when he was on stage at the 2014 TC Disrupt, we learn that:
“By mastering the act of rising above, successful people are able to remain rational and calm in the presence of the irrational and chaotic. They master rising above the rest, no matter what the circumstance.”
4. They Are Solution Focused
Do you spend more time focused on the negative person and how they affect your life than on achieving your goals? If so, then you have a problem. Instead of focusing on the negative, focus on your goals.
5. They Understand the Importance of Support
Reach out to your mentors, chances are, they have experienced what you are going through. There is a good chance that co-workers, team members, even family and friends have useful tips to help you get by. The emotionally intelligent understand how to tap into their resources to get through the challenges of working with toxic people.
6. They Are Aware
Self-awareness is important, because it involves knowing what it takes to push your buttons in order to prevent it from happening. Lack of emotional control is a great way to empower the toxic people in your life.
7. Forget-Me-Nots
Being forgiving comes with being emotionally intelligent. It allows you to remain unburdened by the mistakes of others and to have peace of mind. But being forgiving does not mean forgetting whom you can and cannot trust. It just means you stop wasting mental energy on those you cannot trust.
8. They Store Their Energy for Better Opportunities
As I have mentioned several times, the toxic thrive on chaos, and will do anything to have the ability to take you down to their level. Learning to understand your limits will help you to stay away from dangerous situations. Choose your battles wisely, and conserve your energy for bigger and better things.
Final Thoughts
Those we look up to as being the “bigger person” or as being able to conduct themselves in the most challenging of situations do not have a magic solution in their back pockets, but they have worked hard to become emotionally intelligent people. What are some of the challenges you have experienced with toxic people?
Related Reading:
How Successful People Handle Toxic People